A CoupleStrong Blog

 Inspired by Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue’s “What Makes a Marriage Last”

In a world where headlines focus on heartbreak and divorce, What Makes a Marriage Last offers something beautifully countercultural: a celebration of staying power. In this heartfelt collection, Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue interview 40 couples from all walks of fame—actors, musicians, journalists, and public figures—about what has sustained their marriages through the highs and lows of life.

But what’s most powerful about the book isn’t just the length of the marriages—it’s what sustained them. At CoupleStrong, we know that no two relationships are the same, but the ingredients for lasting love often are. This book offers a mosaic of real, lived-in wisdom—and below are the themes we believe every couple should consider on their own journey.

1. Marriage Is Work—But It’s Worth It

Every couple interviewed in the book says some version of this truth: love doesn’t just happen; it’s built. Over decades.

Marriage is not a fairy tale—it’s a daily decision. And the strongest couples learn to:

• Show up when it’s hard.
• Talk when it’s uncomfortable.
• Stay when walking away feels easier.

Lasting marriages aren’t made by avoiding conflict—they’re made by learning how to navigate it together.

2. Humor and Friendship Matter More Than You Think

One of the most common threads in the book? Laughter. Couples who play, tease, and joke together often weather storms better than those who don’t.

Why? Because friendship builds resilience. You can’t just be lovers—you need to be partners, teammates, and sometimes comic relief for each other.

At CoupleStrong, we encourage couples to:

• Revisit what made you laugh in the beginning.
• Schedule time to play—not just plan.
• Remember, shared joy is a glue all its own.

3. You Grow—Together or Apart

The book makes clear: people change. Over 10, 20, 40 years—you will become different versions of yourselves.

The key? Grow together. That means:

• Supporting each other’s evolution.
• Grieving what’s lost while embracing what’s new.
• Staying curious about your partner across every season.

As one couple shared, “The person I married is not the same person I’m married to now. And I love who they’ve become.”

That’s not just romantic—it’s intentional.

4. Shared Values Hold You Steady

In times of hardship—illness, career shifts, parenting chaos—the couples in What Makes a Marriage Last leaned into shared values: faith, service, family, creativity, honesty.

When couples have a shared “why,” they can endure almost any “how.”

So ask yourselves:

• What are the non-negotiables that anchor us?
• What mission or belief system guides our choices?
• How can we reconnect to those values in hard times?

At CoupleStrong, we often say: marriages don’t just break from big betrayals—they drift apart from unnoticed misalignment. Shared values bring you back.

5. Love Is a Practice, Not a Feeling

The takeaway from all 40 stories? Love isn’t magic. It’s practice.

It’s:

• Saying “I’m sorry” when pride screams not to.
• Making dinner even when you're tired.
• Leaving space for your partner to be human—and still choosing them.

Love that lasts isn’t love that’s perfect. It’s love that’s persistent.

At CoupleStrong, we believe every couple has a story worth writing.

What makes a marriage last isn’t the absence of struggle—it’s the willingness to keep turning toward each other, again and again.

So whether you’ve been together five months or fifty years, ask yourselves:

• What do we want our story to say?
• What do we want to remember in 40 years?

You don’t need to be a celebrity couple to build a legacy. You just need commitment, care, and courage.

Want to strengthen your marriage for the long haul?

Explore our Couples Challenges, sign up for Couples Notes for daily inspiration, or dive into our Video & Assessment Libraries to build a legacy that lasts.

#CoupleStrong #WhatMakesAMarriageLast #MarloThomas #LongLove #LegacyInLove #MarriageWisdom